Some people often approach divorce the same way they do a breakup with someone that they’re dating. They emphasize that the relationship is not working out, but they want to remain friends and stay on good terms. Is this a goal that you should shoot for with your own divorce?
Some psychologists suggest that it is healthy to stay friends and learn to cope with the loss of the relationship because doing anything else — acting like strangers, for instance — just means you’re repressing the way you feel. It is better to deal with the end of the relationship and learn how to move on.
Do you have children?
Another thing to consider is whether or not you have children. If not, it’s easier to break that relationship off and go your separate ways. If you have kids, though, odds are you’re going to share custody. That means you at least have to cooperate and learn how to raise your children together, despite not being married. You don’t need to be friends, necessarily, but it’s helpful to be on civil terms.
You also want to consider the atmosphere you create for the children. If they see that you can get along, regardless of how you feel, it can help them with things like birthdays, holidays, and graduations. You don’t want to make these stressful for your children or refuse to both attend important events.
Divorce is complicated. Know your options.
No matter what you do, you can see that post-divorce life is complicated. Make sure you know what legal steps to take to make it go as smoothly as you can.