Telling your kids that you are getting divorced could be one of the most difficult conversations you will ever have. Yet, it is one you must have, and you need to do so before they find out from someone else.
There are always reasons to put it off. For instance, you have not yet worked out all the details and only want to speak to them once you have the complete picture. Or now is not the time as their hamster just died or they have important exams coming up. Yet the longer you leave it, the greater the risk that someone else mentions it to them, making the news even harder on them.
Kids want to know how it will affect them
What will change for your child when you divorce, and what will stay the same? Their priorities may be different from yours. You might focus on the financial side. Your kids may be more concerned about whether they will still see their friends and who will look after their pet rabbit if they don’t have a garden anymore.
Divorce is not all negative for kids
You do not want your children to think you are trying to gloss over the issue by highlighting the positives, but they are worth mentioning. For example, they get to see Grandma more as you will move closer. Or they will now get twice as many holidays and birthday parties, one with you, one with their other parent. For many children, the biggest positive will be they no longer need to hear mom and dad arguing all the time.
Getting legal help to understand how your divorce is likely to play out will help you give your children accurate information that puts their and your mind at ease.